Monday, March 29, 2010

You'll Put Your Eye Out

Tomorrow or Wednesday I'm going to do a proper post about Bologna and Italy and Squids, but as I'm hurriedly finishing up a story for a deadline today and also profoundly jetlagged and also had one eye for much of the day, just a quick post now to say that you should never, never touch your eye.

Because if you touch your eye or scratch or rub it, especially when you are in a foreign country, it might suddenly turn bright red, get really itchy, and then get really painful. And did I mention red? You might have to seek help from the Italian healthcare system at midnight and find that what you heard about most Italians knowing a little English is definitely not true. And you might find yourself filling a prescription for a drug that neither you nor the doctor really understands. You might be told that you have to keep your contact lens out of that eye, because it will make your eyeball into a petri dish. That will make walking and sight-seeing difficult, as your uncorrected vision is 20/900 or -9 diopter. And one eye will act as a telescope and the other as a blurry Monet painting.

Then you will find out that you have to wear glasses because you have to wait for the Eyeball Ulcer to heal. You will go find glasses, and in your attempt to look punk and cool, will look Scholarly, Respectable, Thoughtful, and ultimately Librarian. You are happy to be mistaken for possibly one or two of these but all of them is hard to bear. Still, these things happen.
My New Glasses Make Me Into a Librarian
My New Glasses Make Me Thoughtful
My New Glasses Make Me Scholarly
My New Glasses Make Me Into a Librarian, the sequel

14 comments:

Shannon Whitney Messenger said...

Aw. Poor Maggie! Eye stuff freaks me out--I think I'd rather get my annual physical that go to the eye doctor with the puffs of air and weird contraptions holding open my eyelashes. *shudders* Hope your eye is feeling better.

Oh--and Boy Toy? <3 that book!

Ella Press said...

Sorry to hear that, Maggie!
But in retrospective, that's a really cool anecdote to tell to your future grandchildren, right?
You rock the glasses!

downworlder said...

boy toy? interesting...

Frankie Diane Mallis said...

You look Bad *ss in glasses. I say punk librarian! Rock it. And sorry about the eye:( Ouch!

Larissa said...

:(

You've really never heard that you shouldn't touch your eye?!?

That book looks interesting. I will have to add it to my TBR list.

Kelly@ JustWrite said...

Who knew? I always touch my eyes. I'd be right there with you!

But you look totally cool in glasses. Seriously.

Donna Gambale said...

Punk and cool is overrated. I say this only because I will never in life exude punk or cool, whereas you exude punk and cool on a daily basis and have the magical ability to immediately turn Scholarly, Respectable, Thoughtful, and ultimately Librarian Glasses into the epitome of Punk, Cool Glasses.

I too wake up in my own little impressionist painting each morning.

Maggie Stiefvater said...

BOY TOY = a very well written and disturbing book that I read a year ago and just got the hardcover for. I recommend it.

And lol, Donna! Thanks!

The Graef Family! said...

I hate it when I have to wear my glasses because of eye problems. I feel your pain. I hope it gets better for you soon. Your glasses are wicked cute though. You pull them off very well. :)

Suzanne said...

Very cool... never take those off. Really. Like, sleep in them.

Suzanne said...

Also, I feel like I should tell you that the word I was asked to verify before posting was "turred". Which isn't spelled correctly, but made me snort all the same.

adris:) said...

Love your glasses :)

Em said...

Love the photo adjective illustrations! :) I hope the eye is better soon!!

Maggie Stiefvater said...

Sleep in them, ehhh, Suzanne? *grin*

Thanks, Adris and Em!

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